Recently a friend told me she could not open the full posts of my blogs at work (a school system) because Radiant Abilities came up as a dating site.
Yes! That’s great news, although not at all true.
My intention is to periodically have dating resources for people, particularly in the areas of having the confidence to date, radiating the Power to Attract, and Healthy Relationships and Sexuality.
However, in keeping with the reputation of being a “dating” site, let’s talk about whether or not you should disclose of your online dating profile if you have a disability. I’ll share my answer through this story.
When I was doing online dating, I always put on my profile that I live with cerebral palsy. In the dating world, and pretty much in general, I’m a “cut to the chase” person who likes to put everything on the table. When I was dating, I wanted people to know I live with CP so that if they could not live with it, they could step aside and make room for those who could. Remember, You’re Not for Everyone.
This one time, as I was planning to meet a guy for coffee, I emailed him specifically about my disability. We had been emailing each other for a bit and the subject had not yet come up. I remember writing that I just wanted to mention it so that he wasn’t surprised. No response.
Turns out I was the surprised one. He had cerebral palsy too.
As he approached me in the restaurant with the familiar gait and hand movement, I thought, “You got to be kidding me.” Not that he had cerebral palsy, but that he refused to go there. For me, things were over before he sat down.
His lack of acknowledgement about his disability (let alone mine) spoke volumes to me about how he was coping with his disability, and about his communication and problem solving skills in general. Important factors in dating.
Another reason why I say a resounding yes to disclosing your disability on your profile is because I believe that by not doing so, it reinforces the shame of disability.
Put it out there! Your disability is a wonderful part of what makes you YOU!
To reinforce that, share with me below one aspect of your disability that attributes to your wonderfulness. See mine below.