What is the one thing that ensures success?

Yes, there are many attributes, skills, and even facets of your personality that fosters success. You could be smart, be a wizard at interacting with people, and be the most entertaining person you know – or not.

I’m not talking today about what I frequently discuss, identifying your strengths and abilities.

I’m talking about what keeps you going, what holds your vision, and what continues to ignite the embers of belief when they’re burning low?

I’m hedging my bets on a Fierce Pursuit of Dreams. You may have different words for it, but you know what it feels like.

Refusal to give up because you know if you do, a part of your soul will die.

The Fierce Pursuit of Dreams is a crucial ingredient for anyone’s success, but particularly if you live with a disability. This is because the world, people, and your own body will frequently tell you no, it can’t be done, or even the dreadful “maybe for others, but not you.”

If you’re like me, these moments inflame a determination in me that extends far deeper than the ego’s retaliation of “Well, I’ll show you.” Granted, in my younger days, I had many of those. I’m encouraging you, though, to scratch beyond the surface of that. There’s always something more there.

It’s your drive to lead a fulfilling life or to have your love one with a disability lead one. It’s that passion, that burning desire that just won’t go away. It keeps whispering to you, “Don’t give up, have faith, you can do this, don’t turn away from what you want.”

To be honest, there have been a few times in my life when I wanted to silence this constant urging because everything felt too hard and took way too long, compared to people without disabilities.

One of the biggest examples of this from my own life was dating and relationships. I only went on less than a handful of dates in high school and college. I rarely got ask to dances. I attended, usually without a date, the wedding of friend after friend. I began to wonder how my life would be if I never “found someone.” Yet I had this dream of having someone in my life and of having a family that JUST WOULD NOT DIE.

I just had a Fierce Pursuit of Dreams that kept me going…and…this is the oh so important part:

The continued barriers and lack of success pushed me to do the hard work to bring my dreams closer to reality.

Hard work may not necessarily be focusing on the goal or dream every day, but sometimes doing the more subtle tasks of self-reflection, gaining clarity, increasing your trust in yourself, and growing confidence. For me, all these endeavors eventually brought me the happy marriage and family I have today. Yes, I believe I had to work harder than my peers without disabilities to get what I now have. And yes, it was worth it!

My Fierce Pursuit of Dreams has created for me the life I longed for – and it can you too.

The Fierce Pursuit of Dreams is also why I created Radiant Abilities to help you learn to define yourself, how to empower your child, and get new perspectives for professionals. They are all videos, each with a helpful Take Action guide. Yes, time and a bit of work is involved. Radiant Abilities is not just here to encourage you, but give you fuel for your Fierce Pursuit of Dreams.

If you’re like I was and dating and relationships is in your Fierce Pursuit of Dreams, Dating, Relationships, and Disability: How to Have Confidence and Succeed, an online course and coaching program, opens for enrollment on May 31. Click here to get helpful resources and notifications leading up to the opening of the course.