210 - The Six Pillars of Unshakeable Dating Confidence

📅 ENROLLMENT CLOSING OCT 25 Dating Made Easier  will be stopping open enrollment on October 25th! After that, we'll only open enrollment at specific times during the year.

🔥 DATING CHALLENGE: OCT 14-17 Get crystal clear on your dating profile and create a winning plan!

🎯 FREE WORKSHOP: OCT 21 "What to Do When Nothing Works in Dating" - This one's going to be GOOD!

🎁 SWEET OFFER COMING MID-OCTOBER for email subscribers only! Get on the list here. Trust me, you won't want to miss this amazing surprise!

And don't forget to take our Dating Success quiz to see what stage you're in.

Stage 2: Confidence Building and Resilience Training

Stage 2 is designed for those who've completed foundational self-worth work but struggle to translate internal confidence into external action. This stage builds the resilience and social skills needed to navigate dating situations and handle challenges with grace.

The Six Pillars of Stage 2 Mastery

Pillar 1: Assertiveness Training and Boundary Setting Practice self-advocacy in low-stakes situations using the DESC method: Describe objectively, Express feelings and needs, Specify desired outcomes, and state positive Consequences. Start with non-dating scenarios like requesting accommodations at restaurants.

Pillar 2: Rejection Resilience Through Role-Playing Systematically practice difficult scenarios with a trusted friend—insensitive questions, accessibility challenges, or potential rejections. Build go-to responses and recovery strategies.

Pillar 3: Low-Stakes Social Confidence Building Engage in social "strength training" through low-pressure activities like hobby groups, volunteering, or community meetups. Focus on practicing small talk, handling accessibility needs, and building comfort in public spaces.

Pillar 4: Personal Rejection Reframe Strategy Develop a "Reality Check Method" to avoid catastrophizing. Consider multiple rejection reasons beyond disability: incompatible values, timing issues, communication styles, or simple lack of chemistry.

Pillar 5: Mindfulness and Anxiety Management Learn practical techniques like 4-7-8 breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and positive self-talk scripts. The goal is managing anxiety, not eliminating it.

Pillar 6: Building Your Confidence Support Network Cultivate relationships for different support types: accountability partners, disability community friends, mentors, and professional counselors.

Stage 2 Milestones

Before advancing, demonstrate: confident self-advocacy in multiple settings, successful navigation of challenging social situations, effective anxiety management, recovery from rejection without spiraling, comfort in unfamiliar social activities, and a strong support network.

Key Takeaway

Confidence isn't the absence of fear—it's the ability to act authentically despite discomfort. Stage 2 builds resilience muscles through deliberate practice in challenging situations.